I was hanging out with my in laws over the weekend and someone asked me how I was doing. Before I could utter my stock response of "good" my husband interjected "Have you read her blog?" And this was said in a somewhat sarcastic tone. I could not help but wince. Have I made my life sound so tragic?
Granted, I am frustrated with where I am right now professionally and personally but in no way do I want to come off as ungrateful or less than satisfied with my life overall. So let me start this week’s blog with some solid reasons why I am utterly grateful to be me.
1. I have my health. I know that sounds cliche but it is true. I rarely get sick and all of my limbs work. (Knock on wood.)
2. I dig my husband. He is smart, good looking, funny as hell and good natured. He is my favorite.
3. I have potential. I don’t look too bad on paper. I have a JD, I came from a decent college, "Go Gauchos," and I am not afraid of hard work.
4. I have a starter house. Its got more corners than I know what to do with and some awful fixtures and the most horrendous cabinet doors I have ever seen but all-in-all it’s a cute house with tons of potential.
5. My friends are cool. Seriously, I am so impressed with every single friend of mine. I can turn to any one of them for a hearty laugh or a serious dose of wisdom. They are geniuses by the way. I swear all of my friends are 10 times smarter than myself, but that is another topic...
6. Last but not least, my family rocks. Most of the time. Well most of them do.
Now ask me what I was grateful 10 years ago and it probably would have went something like this.
1. $1.50 margarita and free appetizers at El Paseo
2. Clearing $60 in tips.
3. Passing my classes.
4. My fast metabolism. I seriously lived on Bud Light, $4 champagne, pasta and bagels for 4 years.
5. Roommates that paid the rent.
I wonder how my list will change 10 years from now?
J
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
Sunny Side Ups (K)
Listen… I do not mean to sound like a woe-is-me bitch baby. There is a very bright side to being 30. I have learned lots of things that make the life of a gal in her 30s more interesting. First of all, I have become way more perceptive of people. I think much of this has come from meeting people in the restaurant and bar industry, but more from meeting people by immersing myself in new situations, i.e., new city, grad school programs, new jobs, etc. I have learned to really listen to a person and hone in on his character, not in a judgmental way, but just to get a better understanding of a that person. It’s a fun guessing game I like play. For example, an acquaintance asked me to guess his age. I guessed he was between 22-25 years old. Correct, he is 25. I asked why he wanted me to guess and he replied that there was no reason. I immediately asked him if he liked an older woman. His jaw dropped. It was just something I sensed. It ends up that he is interested in a woman in her early thirties. Weird! In general, I really enjoy meeting new people and hearing of their experiences and learning more about them.
Second, I am learning that planning everything out is not the best mode of operation. I used to plan out every little detail and if things did not work out as planned, I felt stressed. I felt like I did not have control if my expectations were not met. Now, I try to look at situations not imagining the way they will play out, but instead, I tell myself that things will just work out. In April, I remember when my job at the law firm was coming to a close, I was stressing out looking for another job In San Diego. I had it in my head that I wanted to spend one more summer by the beach before committing myself to B-school. I literally woke up one Monday morning and asked myself what the hell am I doing? Wasting time was my answer. I got on the phone and by the end of the week; I was enrolled in the business program beginning summer 2009. The beach will be there for me to return to. I am allowing things to fall into place…sloooowly but surely. Becoming more flexible has been very good for me.
One more thing. On a recent road trip with Jenny, where I was driving, I was pulled over by the CHP. I knew the second I saw the pretty purple and red lights dancing in the rear view mirror that I was getting a speeding ticket. As the officer took my license back to his patrol car, Jenny and I started rationalizing out the situation, which turned into hysterical laughter. Of course, we had missed the 41 freeway that connects the 5 freeway to the 101 because we ignored the voice of the Garmin GPS. We kept looking at the internet directions we wrote down and confused ourselves by having too much information. Of course, I was pulled over by the CHP that I had "luckily" spotted miles before, right before we decided to we turn off to get food & gas. There is no doubt about the consequences. Fine and online traffic school (I hope its that simple). If I were younger and in the same situation, I know would be scared and worrying myself sick about it. Now, I accept it for what it is. I was not paying attention and my dumbass was driving too fast too furious on the way to a bachelorette party in Santa Barbara. Life goes on. There is no point in obsessively worrying about it. Worrying is a part of human nature, possibly a quality prone more to women than men. But, excessive worrying is a waste of energy. I am learning to pull myself out of that frame of mind and focus at what is really important. On this day, it was about having a good time with old college friends. I was not going to let a small setback ruin an amazing weekend.
These are only a few aspects that keep me cool at 30 something. Great sex… this is another blog for another day…maybe. Cheers!
Second, I am learning that planning everything out is not the best mode of operation. I used to plan out every little detail and if things did not work out as planned, I felt stressed. I felt like I did not have control if my expectations were not met. Now, I try to look at situations not imagining the way they will play out, but instead, I tell myself that things will just work out. In April, I remember when my job at the law firm was coming to a close, I was stressing out looking for another job In San Diego. I had it in my head that I wanted to spend one more summer by the beach before committing myself to B-school. I literally woke up one Monday morning and asked myself what the hell am I doing? Wasting time was my answer. I got on the phone and by the end of the week; I was enrolled in the business program beginning summer 2009. The beach will be there for me to return to. I am allowing things to fall into place…sloooowly but surely. Becoming more flexible has been very good for me.
One more thing. On a recent road trip with Jenny, where I was driving, I was pulled over by the CHP. I knew the second I saw the pretty purple and red lights dancing in the rear view mirror that I was getting a speeding ticket. As the officer took my license back to his patrol car, Jenny and I started rationalizing out the situation, which turned into hysterical laughter. Of course, we had missed the 41 freeway that connects the 5 freeway to the 101 because we ignored the voice of the Garmin GPS. We kept looking at the internet directions we wrote down and confused ourselves by having too much information. Of course, I was pulled over by the CHP that I had "luckily" spotted miles before, right before we decided to we turn off to get food & gas. There is no doubt about the consequences. Fine and online traffic school (I hope its that simple). If I were younger and in the same situation, I know would be scared and worrying myself sick about it. Now, I accept it for what it is. I was not paying attention and my dumbass was driving too fast too furious on the way to a bachelorette party in Santa Barbara. Life goes on. There is no point in obsessively worrying about it. Worrying is a part of human nature, possibly a quality prone more to women than men. But, excessive worrying is a waste of energy. I am learning to pull myself out of that frame of mind and focus at what is really important. On this day, it was about having a good time with old college friends. I was not going to let a small setback ruin an amazing weekend.
These are only a few aspects that keep me cool at 30 something. Great sex… this is another blog for another day…maybe. Cheers!
Sunday, August 30, 2009
Is 30 really the new 20?
Being 30 and realizing that life at this age is not what you thought it would be or what you strived for…. Ugh!!! Now, we are trying to figure out what we each really want to be, do, and have. The transition from being 20-something to 30-something has been stressful, disheartening, annoying, and a lot of work. Yet, the experience is still exciting, rewarding, and always interesting. So we guess 30 is the new 20 because there is still very much to look forward to.
Dial into our bloggy blog for our experiences and points-of-view on a variety of topics, ranging from jobs & careers, family, relationships, and much much more. We welcome and kindly request you share your comments, insight, and personal stories on our blog. Cheers to figuring life out in our 30s!
Dial into our bloggy blog for our experiences and points-of-view on a variety of topics, ranging from jobs & careers, family, relationships, and much much more. We welcome and kindly request you share your comments, insight, and personal stories on our blog. Cheers to figuring life out in our 30s!
Jenny who?
IM 30, NOW WHAT.
No, seriously, now what???
I want to start of by apologizing.
I’m sorry 18 year old Jenny, I have let you down.
I remember how excited you were at your high school graduation.
You had your whole future before you and you had a PLAN. Which reminds me of my favorite saying, "If you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans." (What a nice God by the way...)
So maybe I should stop making them and see what happens because the planning thing has not worked out so well. I am 31 years old and all my well made plans, well, have made other plans...
After graduating high school, I entered UC Santa Barbara as a biology major, and was promptly removed from the department after my first year.
Okay...so I wasn’t going to be a veterinarian...they don’t make that much anyway, and I am going to make money with my big fat Bachelor of Arts degree. Or so I thought. I am pretty sure at 18 I thought I would be rich. Why does every kid in high school think this?
I’m actually an attorney. But still not rich. I’m not exactly sure how it happened. I sure in hell did not plan for this. It’s a blur really, something about 4 years of working full time and studying part time. When all of my friends were enjoying their mid 20s, I was either taking exams and/or crying, attending lectures or studying...that time will be referred to as the most boring period in my life.
The 18 year old Jenny thought everything would have fallen into place by 30. It has not. I even gave myself an extra year, 31, still not quite what I expected.
The 18 year old Jenny thought I would be driving an expensive car. I am now on my third Honda. The 18 year old Jenny also thought she would live somewhere cool...I live in Antelope, California. Cool is over there somewhere.
I did not see myself having children when I was 18, and so far I have not let my 18 year old self down in that department, although 28 year old Jenny is not thrilled with this.
But what I can tell 18 year old Jenny, is that she ends up marrying Tony. Tony tells you 5 years later at a wedding, you know the one, where you were the bridesmaid with the black eye...that he always thought you were cute. Good thing you never knew that in high school, because if you had known, you would have made man-getting-plans and you most likely would have f*cked that up!
So what it comes down to is that sometimes I feel like I am having a third life crisis of sorts...Not sure what my point here on earth is. But I am all for figuring it out!
No, seriously, now what???
I want to start of by apologizing.
I’m sorry 18 year old Jenny, I have let you down.
I remember how excited you were at your high school graduation.
You had your whole future before you and you had a PLAN. Which reminds me of my favorite saying, "If you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans." (What a nice God by the way...)
So maybe I should stop making them and see what happens because the planning thing has not worked out so well. I am 31 years old and all my well made plans, well, have made other plans...
After graduating high school, I entered UC Santa Barbara as a biology major, and was promptly removed from the department after my first year.
Okay...so I wasn’t going to be a veterinarian...they don’t make that much anyway, and I am going to make money with my big fat Bachelor of Arts degree. Or so I thought. I am pretty sure at 18 I thought I would be rich. Why does every kid in high school think this?
I’m actually an attorney. But still not rich. I’m not exactly sure how it happened. I sure in hell did not plan for this. It’s a blur really, something about 4 years of working full time and studying part time. When all of my friends were enjoying their mid 20s, I was either taking exams and/or crying, attending lectures or studying...that time will be referred to as the most boring period in my life.
The 18 year old Jenny thought everything would have fallen into place by 30. It has not. I even gave myself an extra year, 31, still not quite what I expected.
The 18 year old Jenny thought I would be driving an expensive car. I am now on my third Honda. The 18 year old Jenny also thought she would live somewhere cool...I live in Antelope, California. Cool is over there somewhere.
I did not see myself having children when I was 18, and so far I have not let my 18 year old self down in that department, although 28 year old Jenny is not thrilled with this.
But what I can tell 18 year old Jenny, is that she ends up marrying Tony. Tony tells you 5 years later at a wedding, you know the one, where you were the bridesmaid with the black eye...that he always thought you were cute. Good thing you never knew that in high school, because if you had known, you would have made man-getting-plans and you most likely would have f*cked that up!
So what it comes down to is that sometimes I feel like I am having a third life crisis of sorts...Not sure what my point here on earth is. But I am all for figuring it out!
Kathy who?
30! Three zero! Thirty years old. Correction…31 years old. WTF! How did time fly by so quickly? Ten years ago, I graduated from college and had just started my new “grown-up” job. After a couple of great years of living and working in Santa Barbara, I made my way back to San Diego. During this time, I worked in the restaurant & bar industry. What a great job for a girl in her mid-twenties! The huge perk was that I worked for a place that threw the biggest parties at the beach. But that is exactly all it ever could be for me.
At age of 28, I started getting antsy. I was not being challenged. Everyday felt the same. I had very strong friendships with many people, but had not yet had a committed relationship. I was bored and frustrated. I knew had more to offer, not just in regards to a job or career, but I felt, and still feel, that I have something more meaningful to contribute to society. This was the beginning of the transition out of my party-girl lifestyle.
So what did I do to get myself out of that sort of lifestyle and into the “real world?” I applied to go back to school. Not just any old school. I did the prep work and application process to go back to law school. By the grace of God, I managed to get into a law school in San Francisco. Boy oh boy, did I have a difficult first year in law school. Now that experience is over, I have learned a lot more about myself. I better understand some of my abilities, some of my limits, and some of my goals. I am only aware of some of the work I have to do on my self. “Some” is the operative word because at this point, I do not know all of my abilities or all of my limits. In challenging myself, I am continually learning new things about myself. More things will change down this super interesting road.
At this time, I am working on my MBA, “Master’s in Blackout Alcoholic.” In all seriousness, I am working on my MBA, Human Resources concentration. I also work part time in retail, something I thought I would never do. But, with the shortage of suitable jobs and the need to make some sort of income without compromising my moral character (I’m sure you catch what I’m throwing down), I work in retail knowing its just a means to an end.
This is an introduction to the blogging bandwagon that my college roommate, Jenny, and I have jumped on together. Although she has a completely different experience than I do, we do have some common ground, mainly not being where we expected to be in our early thirties. The value in writing our perspective is that maybe we can reach other people who are feeling more of the same, and who care to share their story with us, to give us more perspective, but more importantly, to help us feel better about ourselves. Kidding.
Each week, we will pick a topic and offer our experiences and ideas. Hopefully you all enjoy our little ditties. We also hope that you send us feedback and we definitely welcome you to not only follow us, but please participate. We would love to have guest bloggers!
At age of 28, I started getting antsy. I was not being challenged. Everyday felt the same. I had very strong friendships with many people, but had not yet had a committed relationship. I was bored and frustrated. I knew had more to offer, not just in regards to a job or career, but I felt, and still feel, that I have something more meaningful to contribute to society. This was the beginning of the transition out of my party-girl lifestyle.
So what did I do to get myself out of that sort of lifestyle and into the “real world?” I applied to go back to school. Not just any old school. I did the prep work and application process to go back to law school. By the grace of God, I managed to get into a law school in San Francisco. Boy oh boy, did I have a difficult first year in law school. Now that experience is over, I have learned a lot more about myself. I better understand some of my abilities, some of my limits, and some of my goals. I am only aware of some of the work I have to do on my self. “Some” is the operative word because at this point, I do not know all of my abilities or all of my limits. In challenging myself, I am continually learning new things about myself. More things will change down this super interesting road.
At this time, I am working on my MBA, “Master’s in Blackout Alcoholic.” In all seriousness, I am working on my MBA, Human Resources concentration. I also work part time in retail, something I thought I would never do. But, with the shortage of suitable jobs and the need to make some sort of income without compromising my moral character (I’m sure you catch what I’m throwing down), I work in retail knowing its just a means to an end.
This is an introduction to the blogging bandwagon that my college roommate, Jenny, and I have jumped on together. Although she has a completely different experience than I do, we do have some common ground, mainly not being where we expected to be in our early thirties. The value in writing our perspective is that maybe we can reach other people who are feeling more of the same, and who care to share their story with us, to give us more perspective, but more importantly, to help us feel better about ourselves. Kidding.
Each week, we will pick a topic and offer our experiences and ideas. Hopefully you all enjoy our little ditties. We also hope that you send us feedback and we definitely welcome you to not only follow us, but please participate. We would love to have guest bloggers!
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