Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Sunny Side Ups (J)

I was hanging out with my in laws over the weekend and someone asked me how I was doing. Before I could utter my stock response of "good" my husband interjected "Have you read her blog?" And this was said in a somewhat sarcastic tone. I could not help but wince. Have I made my life sound so tragic?

Granted, I am frustrated with where I am right now professionally and personally but in no way do I want to come off as ungrateful or less than satisfied with my life overall. So let me start this week’s blog with some solid reasons why I am utterly grateful to be me.

1. I have my health. I know that sounds cliche but it is true. I rarely get sick and all of my limbs work. (Knock on wood.)

2. I dig my husband. He is smart, good looking, funny as hell and good natured. He is my favorite.

3. I have potential. I don’t look too bad on paper. I have a JD, I came from a decent college, "Go Gauchos," and I am not afraid of hard work.

4. I have a starter house. Its got more corners than I know what to do with and some awful fixtures and the most horrendous cabinet doors I have ever seen but all-in-all it’s a cute house with tons of potential.

5. My friends are cool. Seriously, I am so impressed with every single friend of mine. I can turn to any one of them for a hearty laugh or a serious dose of wisdom. They are geniuses by the way. I swear all of my friends are 10 times smarter than myself, but that is another topic...

6. Last but not least, my family rocks. Most of the time. Well most of them do.

Now ask me what I was grateful 10 years ago and it probably would have went something like this.

1. $1.50 margarita and free appetizers at El Paseo

2. Clearing $60 in tips.

3. Passing my classes.

4. My fast metabolism. I seriously lived on Bud Light, $4 champagne, pasta and bagels for 4 years.

5. Roommates that paid the rent.

I wonder how my list will change 10 years from now?

J

Sunny Side Ups (K)

Listen… I do not mean to sound like a woe-is-me bitch baby. There is a very bright side to being 30. I have learned lots of things that make the life of a gal in her 30s more interesting. First of all, I have become way more perceptive of people. I think much of this has come from meeting people in the restaurant and bar industry, but more from meeting people by immersing myself in new situations, i.e., new city, grad school programs, new jobs, etc. I have learned to really listen to a person and hone in on his character, not in a judgmental way, but just to get a better understanding of a that person. It’s a fun guessing game I like play. For example, an acquaintance asked me to guess his age. I guessed he was between 22-25 years old. Correct, he is 25. I asked why he wanted me to guess and he replied that there was no reason. I immediately asked him if he liked an older woman. His jaw dropped. It was just something I sensed. It ends up that he is interested in a woman in her early thirties. Weird! In general, I really enjoy meeting new people and hearing of their experiences and learning more about them.

Second, I am learning that planning everything out is not the best mode of operation. I used to plan out every little detail and if things did not work out as planned, I felt stressed. I felt like I did not have control if my expectations were not met. Now, I try to look at situations not imagining the way they will play out, but instead, I tell myself that things will just work out. In April, I remember when my job at the law firm was coming to a close, I was stressing out looking for another job In San Diego. I had it in my head that I wanted to spend one more summer by the beach before committing myself to B-school. I literally woke up one Monday morning and asked myself what the hell am I doing? Wasting time was my answer. I got on the phone and by the end of the week; I was enrolled in the business program beginning summer 2009. The beach will be there for me to return to. I am allowing things to fall into place…sloooowly but surely. Becoming more flexible has been very good for me.

One more thing. On a recent road trip with Jenny, where I was driving, I was pulled over by the CHP. I knew the second I saw the pretty purple and red lights dancing in the rear view mirror that I was getting a speeding ticket. As the officer took my license back to his patrol car, Jenny and I started rationalizing out the situation, which turned into hysterical laughter. Of course, we had missed the 41 freeway that connects the 5 freeway to the 101 because we ignored the voice of the Garmin GPS. We kept looking at the internet directions we wrote down and confused ourselves by having too much information. Of course, I was pulled over by the CHP that I had "luckily" spotted miles before, right before we decided to we turn off to get food & gas. There is no doubt about the consequences. Fine and online traffic school (I hope its that simple). If I were younger and in the same situation, I know would be scared and worrying myself sick about it. Now, I accept it for what it is. I was not paying attention and my dumbass was driving too fast too furious on the way to a bachelorette party in Santa Barbara. Life goes on. There is no point in obsessively worrying about it. Worrying is a part of human nature, possibly a quality prone more to women than men. But, excessive worrying is a waste of energy. I am learning to pull myself out of that frame of mind and focus at what is really important. On this day, it was about having a good time with old college friends. I was not going to let a small setback ruin an amazing weekend.

These are only a few aspects that keep me cool at 30 something. Great sex… this is another blog for another day…maybe. Cheers!